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The Green Fox

Fox Becomes Addicted to Cheese X: Say Cheese for Krystal

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The Green Fox

A long time ago, Fox developed a taste for what would soon become his favorite food:

CHEESE!

Cheese looks like this:

Fox looks like this:  :fox:

Krystal is a cute little fox too, she looks like this:  :krystal:

AND....before we dive into the NEWEST story in this legendary adventurous saga involving the Star Fox team, I present you with...TEXT ART!

YES, TEXT ART! YAAAAAY!

Fox and Falco, navigating the streets of Corneria City, heading to Admiral Z's House of Cheese.

      __________&||___________________________

      [|.......................|

      ||.........## --.#.......|          -                              [| 

      ||.........  #                      -                              [|

      ||.........  Admiral Z's    *  ......|          -              [| 

      ||........    House O' Cheese  ,      -                    [|

      ||.....##        .......|  |    '_                              [|

      ||....#####    /###.....|  |    __                    [|

      ||....######## (...|  _  (/ ) @_/)              [|

      ||..####,  ))/ ##.......|  |(__/                          [|

      ||..#####    .....|    ___/ ----/_|-*/                  [|

      ||..#####____/#####.....|                          [|

      ||...######..      |:                  [|                  [|

      ||.....""""  """"...                                                [|

      [|____________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________________________

                                       

- -- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- ----- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---- ---- --- --- - -- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---                                                                    :fox:  :falco:

___________________________________________________________________________________________

            _____________________________________________________________________________

                                                      FOX BECOMES ADDICTED TO CHEESE X: Say Cheese for Krystal

            _____________________________________________________________________________

    Fox and Falco were dining outside Admiral Z's House of Cheese. The weather was windy, there was a bit of a breeze. 

    "We'd better take our food inside the building," said Fox with a sigh. "My parmesian drenched rigatoni salad is about to fly!"

    "For once, you're actually right about something" said Falco. So Falco and Fox took their meals inside, sneaking about with their sandwiches, like they had something to hide. All this, even though the wind was just about to subside. They then sat down at a table with their cheese sandwiches in tow, when suddenly Falco exclaimed "OH NO!"

    "What is it?" asked Fox, in a dramatic tone.

    "My camera's still outside," said Falco with a groan. "And with all those gusty winds, it's probably been blown!" he added.

    "Don't worry bird-brained buddy, I'll help you get it back. When it comes to finding lost things, I think I kind of have a knack!" said Fox. Fox and Falco darted outside the double-doors of Admiral Z's, all the whilst still carrying their sandwiches of cheese. They examined the sidewalks, outdoor tables, and chairs, but neither of them found the camera, only headless gummi bears.

    "We've looked everywhere, I guess it's time to throw a fit. Your camera's gone Falco, someone's stolen it!" said Fox. Suddenly Fox and Falco noticed Krystal sitting at a table, eating a cheese sandwich, with Falco's digital camera, seated next to her purse. In her hands was a training book, "How to become a Cornerian Nurse"

    "Hey look there's Krystal! Yes, I remember now. I had told her I'd let her use it, I even showed her how. I gave it to her over the weekend, but now I want it back!" said Falco. Fox and Falco asked Krystal for the camera.

    "Sure Falco, you can have your camera back. After all, picture-taking is a bloody nice skill you wouldn't want to lack. But first let me snap a picture with both of you, back to back" said Krystal. So Falco and Fox stood back to back, holding their cheese sandwiches, one resembled a Big Mac.

    "Say cheese!" said Krystal jokingly.

    "Ah, man, do we have to? I don't wanna be part of this!" said Falco.

    "It is kind of awkward, I agree!" said Fox.

    "Say cheese already you blokes!" said Krystal.

    "CHEESE!" said Falco and Fox at the same time. With a flash of light, and a really quick click, Krystal snapped the picture, it came out looking slick!

    "There, you can have the camera!" said Krystal. Falco got his camera back. Then Krystal showed Falco and Fox the picture she took of them holding cheese sandwiches.

    "Isn't that picture a little bit cheesy?" said Falco.

    "Now guess what I'll do?" said Krystal.

    "What?" asked Fox and Falco.

    "I'll put these on my computer, and spread them all over the net! I'll make you two into a meme, you'll be famous, I'll bet!" said Krystal.

The next day.....

    Krystal was at her Corneria City apartment, on her laptop, giggling mischeviously. Uploading the pic to 4cheez, a site devoted to cheese, she grinned ear to ear, not even checking her fur for fleas.

    "This picture will be a hit!" said Krystal. And a smash hit it became. Within a few months Falco and Fox had reached internet fame!

Meanwhile, we join in on Falco and Fox:

    Fox and Falco were IM'ing each other in the same exact room. They were both really bored, looking for a website to download DOOM. Fox was on a message board, asking for the download, when suddenly his jaw dropped, his brain had reached total shock overload. He began telling Falco over I.M. what he saw that had shocked him.

   

:fox: WarriorwithNobleFur987: This photo, on the avatar, of this message board dude. It's me and you Falco, but hey, at least we're not nude.

:falco: ThunderBird334: It's the same picture Krystal took of us downtown. We're both looking goofy holding cheese sandwiches, but man  you REALLY look like a clown!

:fox:WarriorwithNobleFur987: WHAT? This is absurd!  It looks like we're becoming popular, I need to maintain my poker face. I just saw on Lylat image search, that pic has been spreading all over the place.

:falco: ThunderBird334: Hey, that's kinda cool Fox, I mean, in a way. We were made for the internet, we're here to stay!

:fox: WarriorwithNobleFur987: Let's put ourselves on Lylat-tube and explain the whole thing. Pretty soon the paparrazi will chase us, and we'll be wearing lots of bling.

:falco:ThunderBird334: Yeah, I'll get my webcam fired up, come on over here. Take that hunk of Colby jack with you, and display yourself without any fear!

  :fox:WarriorwithNobleFur97: ALRIGHT FALCO! Let's make a video about how tasty and delicious CHEESE is! It will go viral for sure!

VIRAL VIDEO! YAY! WOOOO!

Fox and Falco began singing in front of the webcam with microphones, wearing backwards hats:

:fox:

We like cheese, cheese is the bomb!

:falco:

Cheese is tastey, with cheese you can't go wrong

:fox:

High pitched inflection: Colby jack, feta or chedder....when it comes down to it, there's nothing better!

CHEESE! Cheese is the bomb! Save this song to your blank CD-ROM!

:falco:

Cheese rules. Cheese rules. Say cheese for us now! Say cheese for us now! WOO!

:fox:

Cheese is good, cheese is fine, cheese makes a fox feel so sublime!

:falco:

Cheese. It's the power. The p-p-power!

:fox:

Sing about cheese and act really foxy!

:falco:

Keep singing from your heart and you'll make it to the topsy!

There were even more lyrics, but did you really want to read them?

ANYWAY....

So, in addition,  Fox and Falco made a video explaining entirely what happened, the fateful day that Fox became addicted to cheese. Months later, even the cornerian army caught on. General Pepper told Fox that if cheese made him strong, he should have been taking it with him on his deadly combat missions all along. The media, the press, everywhere on Corneria there was a buzz, all about Fox's love of cheese. Fox was already the savior of Corneria, so what was there not to love? It increased sales of cheese, they practically skyrocketed to heaven, up above. Regular Lylat-Tube videos were edited, and Fox and Falco were put into them, with a loud voiceover shouting "I'M A FIRING MAH CHEESE BOMB!" as Fox  and Falco began tossing cheese bombs in the videos. Fox and Falco's song about cheese interrupted many online movies. A lylat version of rick-rolling had soon hit mainstream. My oh my, Fox and Falco were a popular meme.

But eventually, the thing got taken too far. Cheese enthusiasts crashed into Fox's house, asking him questions all the time. Why do almost all these words seem to rhyme? Fox was sitting in his lawn chair (indoors?), sipping lemonade, wearing his father's old sunglasses, feeling sublime. Being asked questions? Now was not the right time.

    "What's your favorite kind of cheese?" asked a young fox pup with a T-shirt that had Krystal's photo on it.

    "When did you first discover you were a cheese head?" asked another fox pup.

    "What made you decide to devote your life to both Corneria and cheese?  Do you ever have time to scratch your fur for fleas?" asked yet another.

    "You're really a hunk! No pun intended!" said a girl fox.

    "You're a really cute guy, but not in the picture, what's up with that? Compared to Falco, you looked like a rat!" said another girl fox. That was the final straw. Fox could not take any more.

    "I JUST NEED SOME FREE TIME AND SPACE! I need time off from my Arwing missions and defending Lylat. Otherwise I go crazy. If all my time off is spent answering questions about cheese, how will I have time to scratch my fur for fleas? PLEASE GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!" said Fox.

Meanwhile.....

:krystal:

I feel sorry for Fox. That photo wasn't even the best. I feel bad for him, I think I'll put this all to rest! It was my idea in the first place. And after learning what it was, I think cheese is pretty tasty! I'll explain it was all my idea, NOT his, I'll make it swift and hasty!

Krystal uploaded a video to Lylat-Tube explaining it was HER idea to make cheese be popular all over Corneria. Then....well...the media and lovestruck Krystal fanboys flocked to her like birds.....all just because of a few simple words........

CHEESE IS REALLY REALLY AWESOME!!!!

CHEESE IS AN EPIC WIN!

:krystal:

I appreciate my fans, and I appreciate cheese. I don't mind the press at all, so long as they let me scratch my fur for fleas.

Below is everyone's favorite friendly blue fox, Krystal, navigating the streets of Downtown Corneria City, heading for Admiral Z's house of cheese.

      __________&||___________________________

      [|.......................|

      ||.........## --.#.......|          -                              [| 

      ||.........  #  # ......|          -

      ||.........  Admiral Z's    *  ......|          -              [| 

      ||........    House O' Cheese  ,      -                    [|

      ||.....##        .......|  |    '_                              [|

      ||....#####    /###.....|  |    __   

      ||....######## ((#.....|  _  (/ ) @_/)____ 

      ||..####,  ))/ ##.......|  |(__/

      ||..#####      '####.....|    ___/ ----/_|-*/    [|

      ||..#####____/#####.....|                          [|

      ||...######..######......|      |:                  [|

      ||.....""""  """"...                                                [|

      [|____________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________________________

                                       

- -- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- ----- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---- ---- --- --- - -- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---                                                                    :krystal:

___________________________________________________________________________________________

AND NOW...before we leave...Krystal sings her own version of the Ballad of the Cheese Addicted Fox:

:krystal:

I've got a boyfriend whose addicted to cheese. He eats it so much, he never checks his fur for fleas.

I didn't always know what cheese was.

I came from a forest planet, just because.

Once I took a bite of cheese,

I felt one with nature, lakes and trees!

THE END

Now I bid you farewell! And please, check your fur for fleas!

HOORAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HOORAY FOR CHEESE! AND FOX! AND KRYSTAL! AND FALCO!

:slippy:

Me too?

YES SLIPPY, YOU TOO!

Note: I plan to expand this story and make it longer eventually. Also, there will be many more fox becomes addicted to cheese sequels in the coming weeks and months.

   

 

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Sluggsnipa

Um...not bad?  :D

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The Green Fox

Um...not bad?  :D

YOU CRACK ME UP!

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The Green Fox

Lol. You sir, crack me up, as well.

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Fire Yoshi

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I don't see it :P

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The Green Fox

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I don't see it :P

Oh come now, my friend, you just have to believe.

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